Writing through the pain

This week’s topic on the ACFW email loop was how writers cope with/use pain while they write. I have only replied to topics a few times (I dunno, call my chicken) and I almost didn’t to this, but felt God telling me to.

It’s funny, because out of the few emails I’ve sent, I received the most feedback out of this one. Amy suggested that I post it on my blog, so given that I had to work on our quarter taxes from home tonight, and I’m dead tired, I figure tonight is a good night to borrow from my email.


I am going to reply a bit differently I think.

I have not had a ‘pain free’ life, but it has been much less painful than many other’s. I have been to 2 funerals, my uncles and my Grandfathers. I loved them both and miss them, but I wouldn’t label them as life altering or writable pain.

I miscarried one baby, which is probably the most painful thing I have experienced. But as hard as that was, I now have my Lacy Emma who wouldn’t be here had Abigail been full term, so I know that God works in awesome ways, and I’ll get to see my baby in heaven someday!

Back to the topic, so I haven’t been subjected to alot of pain. I’m only 27, and I know my time will come, but I am not in a hurry to experience it.

In fact, I think my problem was opposite of what some had noted. I have a wild imagination, and up until last summer, all my story ideas were dramatic, emotional, stories that ended in a romance, but were very serious books.

One in particular I worked on for many years but could not get past the first few chapters.

Last Summer God hit me on the head with my problem. I was trying to write through pain and emotions that I’d never experienced. I was writing out of my fears, instead of my experiences.

So I stopped and asked myself, what HAD I experienced. Now, I am a wife (was married when I was 18) and a mother of 3 children, so most (er… all) of my adult life has been craziness. We are a happy funny carefree family who loves to love and be silly!

God showed me that it was my season of life to have FUN with my writing. Instead of writing all these serious books (my husband told me I needed to stop having poeple die…), I need to write books that would make people laugh and smile and feel good.

There will be a time later, when my heart needs an outlet for pain, that I can write my serious books. But I don’t feel like I am wise enough to do them justice yet.

So for now, I write romantic comedy and am LOVING IT! After struggling for years on one book, I was able to write a completely new book in 3 months! What a great feeling of accomplishment! I have found my ‘home’ genre and finally feel that ‘fit’.