My hubby and I are starting to try and commit to walking/working out at least once a week together. We both have our individual time, but doing it together once a week has super helped our commitment to getting a bit healthier in 2015, as well as made the process much funner!
We were on the track and I was walking in front of him and he texted me, “Hey, this lady in front of me has a really cute butt” and I replied back something like, “Not yet, but she’s working on it!”
TMI, I know, but it was fun.
Anyway, while we were walking, I was listening to Pandora and a song came on that I’d never heard before by Casting Crowns. I listen to Christian radio a LOT so not sure why I’ve never heard this before, but someone needs to play this song more often because it was AWESOME.
It was called Broken Together.
The chorus sings,
“Maybe you and I were never meant to be complete
Could we just be broken together
If you can bring your shattered dreams and Ill bring mine
Could healing still be spoken and save us
The only way we’ll last forever is broken together”
BEST MARITAL ADVICE EVER!
We always use the cliche “you complete me” but ya know? No we don’t.
Two imperfect people coming together do not equal perfection. Marriage is addition, not multiplication. Two negatives do NOT equal a positive, but just means there is even more faults in the whole.
I know, real encouraging there, Krista!
But I look back on my 15+ years of marriage and think of how many times I lamented this. We should complete each other! Ying to my Yang. Peanut Butter to my Jelly. Milk to my chocolate chip cookies. (dad gum diet…)
The reality ends up being that sometimes you’re broccoli and he’s chocolate chips. Or water and oil or whatever opposite, conflicting analogy you want to use.
If you’re looking for perfection in your marriage, you won’t find it. You might have an illusion of it at first, a pretty presentation. But when the newness wears off and the tough stuff comes, it rarely if ever stays that pretty.
I look at my hubby and see… a very imperfect man. I could give you a long list of his imperfections and things that annoy the DAYLIGHTS out of me, and he could do the same about me. (His list for me would probably deservingly much longer!)
But he’s MY imperfect man. I love him, brokenness and all. The moment when I demand his perfection is the moment that my marriage turns toward a destination of failure.
This doesn’t mean that we don’t try to get better. It doesn’t mean we accept certain things that are NEVER acceptable like abuse. But it does mean we love even when it isn’t easy. We help glue each other back together and smile at the cracks in our pots. Because those cracks are part of the beauty. Those broken bits make us unique, and make them ours.
Another great line in the song…
“It’s going to take much more than promises this time
Only God can change our minds”
Let’s Chat! Have you ever thought of a marriage as two broken people? Any struggles you’ve overcome and want to share?