We’ve been bumped several times in this process. And really, I DO UNDERSTAND!
The first surgery, schedule was Friday but an emergency came up and doctor couldn’t do it until Monday… and this was AFTER she was already intubated, put to sleep, and the little dotted lines on her chest.
Then a few weeks ago, we were scheduled for Tuesday Cath but got bumped to Wednesday due to an overload in the Cathlab on Monday. I totally understand. Stuff happens.
BUT URGH! This Glenn thing is testing every ounce of my patience!
First… we were told that we needed to have it “pretty quickly” after her heart cath because of risk of lung infection (which she got last week by the way! Or they think she got… or something…)
Then, they said, no, we can’t do it until end of the next week, beginning of the week after. I didn’t like this, but was okay with it.
Then they said, YEAH, we schedule it… for Wednesday of the week after. Not so yeah for me, because this was now 2 weeks after her heartcath, but I decided that God knows when her surgery needs to be and I need to stop being so demanding.
Then they said, whoops, lots of surgeries next week, it’ll be Thursday.
And again, I was okay with this. Only one day bump.
But this morning they said she isn’t scheduled at all and don’t know when they will schedule her.
THIS I am not okay with. I want to scream and cry and rant and rage. I know I can’t. I know I shouldn’t. I SHOULD be patient and trust that God knows and will plan out the perfect time. I SHOULD be understanding because I know there are a lot of babies who need surgery right now, and theirs is just as important as Annabelle’s.
And I am really not MAD persay, just very, very tired of this and blah. I really just want to know. I’m a planner. I have to plan work, my inlaws are coming into to stay with the kids, my hubby has asked off work too, and I JUST NEED TO PLAN. Plus, I’ve been gearing myself up emotionally for this too, and now that it is a big huge ????? I’m just… yeah. I’m JUST.
Okay, so I’ve vented, and I’ll be better, I promise. I will get over this and will be kind and nice and not yell. I will trust that even when I have no clue what is going on, that God knows.
I might not be perfect at doing them… but I’ll give it a valiant effort.
On a bright note: A nurse let me hold my Annabelle last night! A rare… and needed… treat. I’m contemplating bribing them with chocolate to let me do so again tonight. Then again, I’m afraid of moving her too much and hurting her too. *sigh* One of these days, hopefully SOON< I will be able to just pick up my baby when I want to and love on her as much as my Mommy heart desires!
I’m in a hurry today… so don’t have time to upload a pick, but go here http://twitpic.com/2ylcsc to see a pic of me holding my Annabelle last night!
I will update when I get a surgery date. At this point, I’d be fine if they just made one up so I at least pretend I know what is going on…
We have a date again! And we are on the official schedule! This doesn’t mean, of course, that we can’t get bumped, but i’m hoping and praying not since it is the third date we’ve gotten!
Surgery will be first case on Friday the 22nd. (first case is MUCH better than 2nd since usually if you are bumped, you’re just bumped to later in the day instead of to the next day…)