I was okay all day today. I was strong and joked and read a book and tweeted updates and ate (alot… I’m a stress eater…) and was determined to be okay.
But the moment the surgeon came in here and tell me that she was done and doing fine, I broke down and cried like a big baby. (I totally know it is okay to cry…but they were tears of fear and not joy, and THAT is what I think is goofy of me!)
My momma told me I needed to blog to feel better, so here I am. Writing, regardless of what kind, is cathartic to me for some reason.
So, she came through surgery fine. She is off the heart lung bypass machine and her chest is closed, and she only has one chest tube. They moved her RPA from behind the aorta to in front of the aorta, thus making it impossible for it to sit on that coronary artery. No artery squashing allowed in this baby’s heart!!!
They patched the LPA as well. It is still smaller than the RPA, but it is bigger and should do just fine for her. From the pictures, things look good.
I should be exstatic… and I AM.
But I also know there are still questions to be answered. While what they planned to do worked wonderful and the surgery went great, they weren’t confident that it was her problem. It was just the only plausable thing they could find that could be causing it, but they’d never seen it happen before and couldn’t guarantee us that it would bring her out of heart failure or off of oxygen.
And even if this WAS the problem and it IS fixed, her left ventricle still was weakened and most likely was damaged by lack of blood flow since the transplant (we aren’t sure how long this has been going on.) So there is still the question of if the left ventricle will regain it’s strength. Most times it does, and they are pretty optimistic that it can, but there is still a small chance that it won’t.
I guess my point is this:
YEAH! The surgery worked!
But please please still pray that this is what she NEEDED, and that her left ventricle will regain her strength!
This is NOT me not having faith. I DO have faith that God is with us, that He knows EXACTLY what needs to be done. But I just want to go into this with eyes open so I can be Annabelle’s best advocate… besides Jesus of course, who is her REAL advocate.
In all, they took her down at 2:30, and they finished around 8PM. It was a little longer than they originally anticipated, but mostly due to the large amount of scar tissue they have to go through because of this being her 5th surgery in the same place.
Now, I just need to see my baby (probably in about 2 hours-ish) and then sleep. In that order!
THANK YOU all for being with me today in Spirit. So many people commented, sent messages, texted me, or called, and every single one meant the world to me. If anything, it took my mind off what was going on in the OR for just a bit, and encouraged me a TON. For some reason, I find it really hard to “pray” on surgery days. My prayers consist of “Please, Please Please” and while I KNOW God knows my heart and hears those prayers just as well, knowing so many other sane-minded people are beseeching the throne on our Annabelle’s behalf… it is humbling to us and a great relief.
Thank you, Thank you, THANK YOU!!!
Will update sometime tomorrow on how she is doing.